More mokkais

Exam cum Maargazhi season:

A: மச்சி, இன்னிக்கு சாயங்காலம் ஒரு கச்சேரி போறேன், கூட வாடா.
B: என்னடா ஆச்சு உனக்கு, திடீர்னு கர்நாடக சங்கீதம் மேல பற்று?
A: நாளைக்கு OS exam டா. அதனால் தான் O.S.அருண் பாட்டு கேட்டா பாஸ் ஆயிடலாம்னு..
B: அப்போ சரி, நான் மன்மதன் அம்பு பாட்டு கேக்க போறேன்..
A: ஏன் டா?
B: நாளைக்கு எனக்கு DSP exam டா!

Now this was during our training a few months back:
Someone had got a big bar of chocolate, and all of had a piece of it. Turned out, the flavour was rum raisin (Temptation) and the moment she heard of it, a girl was pretending to swoon. Everyone wanted to see the ingredients, and the chocolate wrapper was passed all over the class. I then said aloud: “Oh, is this what we call wrapper class?”. Pin drop silence. Note that our training was in Java back then.

Another one from training:
Me: Dude, none of us will be sent to MEPZ campus da.
Friend: Why do you say that?
Me: Well, we are all Java developers, aren’t we? We cannot write anything more than basic Java code there.
Friend: What do you mean?
Me: MEPZ stands for Madras Export Processing Zone. And you must import packages and classes to write most Java code. Therefore, it is illegal to develop in Java at MEPZ.
Friend: மச்சி, இங்க ஒருத்தன் சிக்கிருக்கான்..

Wise and not so wise cracks

I’m quite notorious for my wisecracks or mokkais among my friends. Last week I had the chance to unleash some of my custom, spur of the moment mokkais. Here you go:

During the India – Sri Lanka final:

Me: Can you name Thilan Kandamby’s brother?

My brother : ?!?!?!

Me: Thilan Kaanadha Amby. கண்ட அம்பி x காணாத அம்பி

(Note: Kanda and Kaanadha are opposites in Tamil for have seen and unseen :P)

After Federer lost (Aargh….):

Why didn’t Federer win what would have been his 16th grand slam?

He did not come to Tamil Nadu to seek blessings after his marriage. People here bless: “பதினாறு பெற்று பெருவாழ்வு வாழ்க.” (Literally means: Get 16 and live a glorious life). Come here Fedex. You can get No. 16 and more!

On the college bus, listening to உன்னைப்போல் ஒருவன் songs:

Kamal’s next movies:

Unnaipol oru VAN

Unnaipol oru BUS

Unnaipol oru CAR

Unnaipol oru TRAIN

Unnaipol oru LORRY and so on…

An old one from Instincts 2008:

While checking the mike before the light music contest, someone : “check, check, check”

Me: “Come on man! Don’t you know chess, so many checks and no checkmate yet!”

Guys around me: “Why blood, same blood!”

I can predict the comments now: ஒரு நாளுக்கு நாலு மொக்க போட்டா நாலு பேரு காதுல ரத்தம் வரும்னா அந்த மொக்கய போடாமலே இருக்கலாம்